Well, it's been over a month since I've touched my camera, and if we're being honest, it's been more like two or three since I've really done anything substantial. It's hard to admit feeling a little burned out, especially when I have a terrible desire to create all the time and it's my job to be creative and I still have clients with whom I'm working. For some reason, admitting that you're tired makes people question your abilities and I never want my clients or even family and friends to think that I've admitted defeat or anything like that. Because even though I feel like being reluctant to do creative things is weakness or makes me less of a professional or is even that defeat, something also tells me that it's not. And I'm at a good place in my life where I can afford to take a break and it won't hurt me too financially.
So I did. I am. Do I like this break? No, I'm hating it and hate myself for not being able to write a good poem or make a whole bunch of good images or draw a good portrait, especially because this semester has required much of that sort of thing of me. It's been hard. I don't know when I'll get out of this funk, or how, but maybe how I get out is in creating more work. One of our guest speakers for our department, Sunshine Cobb, said that the work inspires you to make more work. You begin with a pot and in the creation of that pot, you're inspired to make more. So perhaps to create again, I need to just begin. I have been doing that a little. I did a quick shoot with a friend over Thanksgiving break, and I hopefully have two more before I go out of town for the Holidays (which I'm really excited about so that's a good sign!).
But I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's all about balance. I just want you to know that it's okay to take breaks, and it's also good to force yourself out of them. So many times I feel like an old woman but I just have to remind myself that there's so much of my life left, and not making anything for three months is o-k-a-y ... especially if I learn something about myself or learn a lesson from it. It's going to take years to find balance between creative work & business & school, especially when they overlap more than they separate.
I think I'm coming out of it though. I'm forever also an advocate of the idea that not doing work inspires you to make more work. Sometimes you just have to take a step back and clear your headspace for new ideas to make their home. (And I have some fun ones!)
Anyone else have experience with getting burned out or unmotivated or disheartened when it came to your art and/or job?